Wednesday, January 11, 2012

It was a Dark and Snowy Week...

On an awesome writing forum I belong to, we have what's called a monthly blog chain with themes. January's blog prompt is: Winter Nightmare! At the end of my post you'll notice more links from my fellow writer's who are also participating this month. You really should check them out. Happy Reading....

It was a Dark and Snowy Week. No, really, it was. I had spent the past four months living with my then fiancĂ© at his Mother and Stepfather's home in Utica, KY. It was February and the temperature had sunk to below the mid 20s. I was 17 years old and had  ran away from my small dinky hometown in Florida. I had defied my parents, broke their hearts and shocked everyone. 

During this particular cold night in February, we had just returned home from doing last minute errands for our move. We had very recently decided to move back to Florida, plans to leave the following Friday, and had spent the day packing up the small mini van with everything we owned. 

Walking in the front door that evening, the chill from the recent snow fall outside causing us to shiver, we quickly welcomed the warmth of the house. However, the looks on my fiancĂ©'s parents faces were enough to stop us in our tracks. Apparently they were angry that we had decided to move back to Florida, and would no longer be getting our $50 a week that we had been giving them. We had broke the news to them two weeks before and they seemed fine with it and even encouraged it. So when they told us to, "get the rest of your shit and get out", it was almost like a slap in the face. 

As we finished packing our things into the van, I asked C, (we'll call him that for privacy sakes), what we were going to do. We had only about $20 to our name until Friday when he was to pick up his last pay check from his job with Tyson Foods. While we had a quarter of a tank of gas, his job location alone was 30 minutes away. He said he didn't know. 

As we loaded up our last box, I had reached a boiling point of anger I never knew my body could obtain. I mean, how could FAMILY do this to us? I grabbed the glass jewlery box that C's Mother had given me for Christmas, slung my arm back and tossed it at the nearest tree. The shattering sound the glass made, as it impacted the tree, actually made me feel a bit better. However it would never prepare me for the week ahead. 

The van's heat did not work unless the van was running, but couldn't run without risking the loss of gas that we needed to use to get the final pay check. That first night we went to C's step sister's house. She said we could only stay one night, but did not want to defy her dad. 

There are a lot of details that occurred during that dreadful week. Too many to try and type in a blog. We spent the majority of the week at the library and a truck stop. We had no where to go. We slept in the van when we could, but mostly spent time wandering around the truck stop closest to C's former job. The $20 didn't last very long, especially because well, C wasn't the most caring guy. He's the reason why I despise smoking so much. Cigarette's were always more important than eating, or bathing to him. Needless to say, while he happily smoked on a pack of Cigarette's that week, I ate a measly pack of Lance crackers. 

Friday finally arrived and we just made it to the Tyson's factory,where C would pick up his check, before our gas ran out. I don't know the lady's name, but she will forever be in my heart for caring enough about us to drive us to a nearby gas station to cash the check, and get gas for our van. That night, before we pulled out for the drive to Florida, we got a hotel room. Safe, warm and had the best shower any homeless person could really hope for. 

It's really hard to write about this time of my life. It's hard to look back and remember the man that while I did eventually marry him, I also divorced him a year later. I was young, stupid, and thought I knew what I wanted in life. He treated me horribly, and this whole ordeal should have been a sign of what the next year that I spent with him would be like. 

Because of this Winter Nightmare, I have a soft spot for true homeless people. I know what it feels like to not bathe for a week, to not have anything to eat, and to see the bottom end of people's nose's as they look up snobbishly at you when you clearly need help. I also have a hate for anyone who smokes, or anyone who is so selfish that they would ignore the real needs of their loved ones, for something that they would rather have. 

I'm stronger for this, and I am better for having lived through something like this. But the nightmares I have during cold weather, when problems arise and family turn their backs on you, it throws me into such a deep depression sometimes I never know if I'll ever come out OK. I have to, I need to, and this nightmare taught me that. 

Thank you for reading about part of my life. 

A firm believer in, "That which doesn't kill you, makes you stronger."

Other Blogs to read in the Blog chain :)

MamaStrong (you are here)
Alpha Echo

*Links to other blogs to come soon*

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Photo Birthday Party!

Today (Jan. 6th) is my sister Ashley's Birthday. As a military family we don't have the luxury of spending all those special days, like birthdays, together. So because I didn't want my baby sister to miss out on an awesome least with me absent anyway, I created the below. Happy Birthday Ashley, Love ya!

First we must start with the cake....
Batter Up!

Licky Licky

In it goes!

It's getting there! 

While that's all cooling, I'll share a personal message :)

"to the greatest sis ever!!!!"

"Even though we're 36 hours apart"
"we'll always be connected"

"God made us sisters because he knew the bond would withstand any Friendship"
"Happy 27th, Birthday....(if that's wrong, blame Mom, she wanted me to do Math)

"Kiss Kiss, post it"

The cake is now finished! I even lit candles.....

And then blew them out :D

To a sister across the mountains, foothills, valleys, The Grand Canyon, and a lot of other things, Happy 27th Birthday! It took 2 blows to blow out the's true...we are getting old. Welcome to the club. :)


Monday, January 2, 2012

About the Author

Greetings Everyone! I know you are all probably thinking, "um, is there a blog author here?" I assure you I am still very much here. Instead of making lame excuses, I thought I'd make a post that will allow you to get inside my head a little. How scary is that huh? OK! Not literally, but I am going to post a few Q & A's below, and then allow you to ask your own for a future blog post. Enjoy!

* Do you have any pets? My family and I were blessed with our pup-kid in October of 2007, a one year wedding present for my husband and I. Rascal became our first child and was my close buddy through a six month deployment. He's still very much a part of our family, however we had to move in military housing. Apparently to them, dogs are NOT your Rascal is currently living with family in Florida until we are able to go get him.

* What was the last book you read? "The Hunger Games Trilogy" written by Suzanne Collins. I would highly recommend this book trilogy to anyone who is interested in a good read. Once the first book was finished I couldn't stop myself from turning the page of my Kindle and jumping into the next book. I read all three within a week.

* What is a favorite event from your childhood? A favorite event would have to be any free moment I was able to spend with my Nanny. Her name was Sarah (like mine, I inherited my first name from her), but since she baby sat so many kids throughout her life, everyone called her Nanny. She was a great role model, and wonderful friend. I miss her so much. It has been 16 years since we lost her and the memories we have will never fade.

* What is your motto in life? ' Do for yourself and not for what others want to see from you'. It's a new standing point for my life. It's also some important advice I received from my sister Ashley M.

* What quote touches your heart more than any other? "Time passes, even when it seems Impossible" this is actually a quote found in the book 'New Moon', the second book of the Twilight series written by Stephenie Meyer ( The moment I read the quote I couldn't help realize how much it centred around my own life.

That's all for now, however I would love to invite you to comment below with your own questions. I will be happy to answer them in a future blog post. Thank you for reading and hope you enjoyed a taste of getting to know me.

Happy Reading!

Saturday, December 24, 2011

What is Christmas?

What is Christmas? Is it the birthday of Jesus? Is it a day when you rush down the stairs to see what Santa brought you? Or is it the time of year where you get together with family? No matter what Christmas is to you and your family, in the end, it's about being happy. Accepting what you have and turning it around to be even more magical than what you wish life had given you. 

For me, Christmas is all about being happy and embracing the gifts of life that surround me. The husband who buries himself in the garage putting together the kitchen play set from Nana. The aroma of cake baking in the kitchen, and the peace and quiet of a napping child upstairs. Christmas is unwrapping presents that were given with love and understanding. Smiling faces around the breakfast table that's filled with syrup-y pancakes and waffles, chocolate milk instead of white, and laughter because you just know that life is great by being together. 

Christmas is singing 'Silent Night' and  'What Child is This' along with the radio while dancing together in the living room. Christmas is laughing and playing games instead of being soaked into a video game or Reality TV show. 

Christmas is a lot of things, but mainly it's about being happy and feeling a sense of warmth as the year comes to a close. A time for new beginnings, fresh starts and looking back on how much you have grown as a person in the last year. 

No matter what Christmas means to you, know that without the events of the past year you would have never become who you are this Christmas. Embrace your family, hold onto your treasures, and smile...

It's Christmas! :)